I am sitting on the couch with my husband's silk sweater (he's going to kill me soon) over my legs, with ice bags on my knees and shins, and one on my lower back. This is all in an attempt to walk tomorrow, upright. :) Oh, and to get my ride and run in tomorrow in a mostly painless fashion.
Not much new has been going on...just work, more work, training and more training. I got the flu this week for a few days and missed work AND training. It was kind of nice to have an entire day off. It meant more work, though. Go figure. I didn't have to make up for the training.
This morning I had a killer swim. Our coach's team hosted an open water swim race this morning. I did the race a month ago and finished the mile in 29 something. Finished it in 25:36 today. Quite the improvement. It took ALOT of self talk. Even so, I about drowned when I saw my time. I wasn't expecting that much improvement in only 4 weeks. Training with Pete is helping me sooo much. Just another instance of "the plan" beieng validated. :) Pete's working. I'm working. The plan is working. YAY!
Had a nice 12 mile run today, too. Hello, WTF is up with ALL the hills in CO? I took a course backwards today, not thinking about THE HILL in it. OOPS. Big ass mother f-ing hill!! I ran it, and am a better runner for it, but it was NOT my idea of a fun time....
I hurt now. Does everyone's knees hurt after 11 miles? It gets better and takes longer to hurt each week, so I guess my body is adjusting. I've had to adopt a new motto: BRING THE PAIN. Sounds dumb, but pain is a reality of triathlon, and as soon as I accept that, I will be a better triathlete. So when I start hurting or bitching out, I say to omyself BRING THE PAIN, and it reminds me that this is triathlon and I will either suck it up and hurt, or I will be a fucking loser. No one wants to be a fucking loser. I especially do not want to be a fucking loser. That's my final answer. Today was proof that I can hurt WAY MORE than I let myself get to. In the swim, I pushed myself hard and let myself hurt, but kept going. The pack in front of my probably hurt, too, but they were swimming. JUST KEEP SWIMMING, JUST KEEP SWIMMING.
Just a few weeks until Boulder Long Course, my first 70.3. I REALLY REALLY want to finish in a decent time, but I will take a finish in the time allowed. Pete said if I finish in 8 hours, we should be scared. If I come in around 7, not so much to be scared about. No stress for my first real endurance event, right? Again, this is triathlon, not knitting. People don't have time to sit around and wait for a bunch of people to take their time, stopping and visiting with others, to come through the finish line. How selfish of me to want to consume all of the volunteers' weekend day so I don't have to have a fucking meltdown about making a certain time. Huhmp.
On a more positive note, Eric and I are scheduled for a 2010 vacation of a lifetime. Something good, outside of an awesome paycheck, has come from his year of traveling.
Ok, he's out here now, so it's time to watch Donnie Darko. Laters.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Checklist for Cycling
It takes me for freaking EVER to get ready for a long ride. In fact, I am constantly forgetting stuff, so I made a list. Now I know why it takes me forever. I'm not the most organized of triathletes.
-Bike: tires checked, tires aired up, check brakes, change out skewer if necessary
-Water/hydration/nutrition: aerobar bottle of Perpetuem, water bottle of water, extension on the aerobottle, food (before, during and after), gels, sharkies, etc.
-ID, road ID braceelet, credit card
-Clothes (easier said than to find! Especially cycling socks--why are they always hiding from me??), cycling gloves, sunglasses
-heart rate monitor (that works--I've broken two in the last two months!)
-heart rate strap (duh.)
-Skewer (the bike one, not the training one. I still can't find the bike one right now! Damnit!)
-helmet (adjusted. I swear little fairies are wearing my helmet at night!)
-Sunscreen (I have extra wipes in my tool bag for when I forget!)
-Phone (fully charged..what a pain!)
-Course description typed up in word to put in my map holder (yes, seriously love the map holder!)
-Map holder
-Bento box attached to hold phone, credit card, ID, etc.
I have been working for well over an hour and a half to get all this shit together. My heart rate monitor is lost, still. It needs a new battery I guess. And I can't find the bike skewer. DAMN!!
-Bike: tires checked, tires aired up, check brakes, change out skewer if necessary
-Water/hydration/nutrition: aerobar bottle of Perpetuem, water bottle of water, extension on the aerobottle, food (before, during and after), gels, sharkies, etc.
-ID, road ID braceelet, credit card
-Clothes (easier said than to find! Especially cycling socks--why are they always hiding from me??), cycling gloves, sunglasses
-heart rate monitor (that works--I've broken two in the last two months!)
-heart rate strap (duh.)
-Skewer (the bike one, not the training one. I still can't find the bike one right now! Damnit!)
-helmet (adjusted. I swear little fairies are wearing my helmet at night!)
-Sunscreen (I have extra wipes in my tool bag for when I forget!)
-Phone (fully charged..what a pain!)
-Course description typed up in word to put in my map holder (yes, seriously love the map holder!)
-Map holder
-Bento box attached to hold phone, credit card, ID, etc.
I have been working for well over an hour and a half to get all this shit together. My heart rate monitor is lost, still. It needs a new battery I guess. And I can't find the bike skewer. DAMN!!
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
11:30 and still doing lunges
My poor (but dear) husband watched me sweat my ass off in front of the TV tonight, on the trainer, draining two Ironman brand water bottles of water....cheering me on. What a sweetie. THEN, as I was printing my strength training workout from the computer, he got ready for bed, and innocently said: "Ok, I am going to bed, you coming?" Uh, NO. "What?" I still have 40 minutes of a leg workout to do. "Seriously?" Uhn huh, quite. "You know what?" I'm fucking crazy? "Besides that." No, what? "You are amazing. You're going to finish IM in 13 hours I bet."
Now how can you resist that?
But there is a point here. It is MUCH easier to watch someone train for IM, than to do the training. It is much easier to have confidence for someone doing IM than it is for me to have confidence in doing IM. For those who look IN on the training, it seems like a lot--and a lot must be good, right? Maybe. Can't tell until the race.
But it IS interesting to ponder why this is so. Eric watches me sacrifice time, sleep, money, sanity, relaxation, pretty much everything....and that gives him a lot of confidence in me. The reality of the situation, though, is that I could barely finish. I CERTAINLY hope this is not the case.....but I'm just a very average person doing a very unaverage event, with a lot of other very exceptional people.
Don't get me wrong--I'm not trying to be negative. I bust my ass day in and day out like everyone else. But the reality of the situation is that I look at the finishing times at the Boulder Long Course last year, and I am going to be in the bottom percent. It's a bit frustrating in some ways. In other ways I'm okay with it--this is my FIRST year of long distance racing. That has to count for something. But being in the bottom percentage reminds me that while I am BUSTING MY ASS day in and day out...I am still at the bottom. :) Killing myself to be in the bottom is better than never being in the race to begin with though.....right? Then part of me is like "who gives a shit what percent you are in? It's your race. If you finish, you win. Period. Run your own damn race."
I was swimming very recently. 8x300 yd intervals. 100-sprint, 100-fast race pace, 100-recovery. Seriously--thought I wasn't going to make the sprints. 25 yds in and my body was already out of oxygen. Quickly went on a fucked up mental trip. I can't do this. This is too hard. Why would anyone want to do this to themselves? I'm not a sprinter. Who cares how fast I take off from the starting line. I'm a long slow distance person. BLAH, BLAH, FUCKING BLAH......I was miserable.
When I started the workout I took 8 pennies and 2 dimes. One dime on the concrete. Under the dime, I made two rows of four pennies vertical. At the bottom I put another dime. Dimes are warmup sets and pennies are intervals. I am lost without a system. So as I am swimming, feeling miserable and negative, I look at ALL of the pennies left at my lane end(in my mind), and feel even worse. I AM NEVER GOING TO FINISH THIS!! WHAT AM I GOING TO DO? SEVEN MORE OF THESE? INTOLERABLE!
After the initial sprint and 75 yards into the "race" pace, I started to feel better. Ok, so just the first half of these intervals suck ass. Can I make it through the first half? I was going to have to come up with a game plan, quickly.
Molly has a wonderful coach, Elizabeth, who wrote an amazing article on women and confidence. I keep it in my planner and read it often. I am absolutely addicited to her article. When my workouts get hard, I think of an analogy she used---a squirrel---fucking fearless--getting it's nuts. She says to get in the pool, talk shit to yourself, and the clock will validate that you totally suck. Get in the pool and think positive, and the clock will validate that you kick ass!
My first strategy on #2 300 yd interval was to fill my head with the word "positive"...repeating it over and over, leaving no room for negativity to creep in and fuck up my swim. It worked pretty well, but took a lot of energy--because I KNEW the negativity was in there--it was just being drowned out. BUT it worked. The sprint was better. #3 and on I tried different approaches. One time I said all positive affirmations to myself: "You are strong, you are tough, you are smart, you are beautiful, you can do this, you've got this, this is good, etc". Another time I thought of the squirrel--and said "squirrel" the entire 100 yds. I even laughed, thinking of the fearless squirrel. Towards the last half of the set, I would repeat the thought of crossing the finish line at IM, hearing my name announced--"Brandy Cohen--YOU ARE AN IRONMAN!" In my mind I related the finish of the race to a excellent swim, and it made the sets fly by. I had to talk myself IN to making the sets be the best that I could give. "Pete wouldn't give me this unless I needed it. This is going to help me be a faster swimmer. I am going to be in better shape because of this. There are other people out there not training as hard as I am. There are people who are more dedicated than I am, and I need to step up. It's better to put in the pain now, to be stronger later. It's not always going to feel like this--just now because I am getting stronger. EVery little bit counts...' and so on, and so on, and so on.
I survived that workout and masochistically ASKED for MORE like it from Pete.
We are all very spoiled. How often do we truly do stuff we don't want to do, besides work? Not very often if you think hard. Ironman training on the other hand forces us to do an array of things we may not want to do--get up early, stay up late, miss parties, miss sleep, miss vacations, do workouts we don't want to do when we don't want to workout, etc. There is no stopping. There is no making up for lost workouts. It's now or never. WE DO WHAT IT TAKES TO GET IT DONE EVEN WHEN WE DONT WANT TO DO IT. We are faced with our spoiled-ness daily, and we turn our backs on giving up.
Iwant to congratulate myself and all of you for STICKING WITH IT--especially when it's hard, especially when you are tired and burned out, and would rather be sitting on your ass, watching cartoons, eating a bowl of ice cream with sprinkles. I still eat the ice cream, but not sit on my ass very much.
This training is time consuming, stressful, hard, but it is so rewarding. Look how far you have come. Really take time to look at what you are accomplishing. Who else in their right mind would have to do a 60 mile ride and get excited? Who else would consider a 60 mile ride a WORKOUT and not complete torture???!!
I am proud to be a part of such an amazing, awe-inspiring, dedicated, rish taking, limit breaking group of motivated, adventure seeking individuals. It is through our shared suffering, sacrifices, and ultimate joy of this sport that we are bonded. We are truly unique and special in our own right.
Again, I am so happy to be here, with you. Taking this journey with others like you makes it so much better.
It's late....12:18am, and I have to get up to go into work early, so I can go to my bike fit appointment on time tomorrow.
Remember--we are incredibly lucky to be able to do what we LOVE--even on the days we fucking HATE it. :) In the end, we are all triathlon addicts and we just have to accept it. :)
Now how can you resist that?
But there is a point here. It is MUCH easier to watch someone train for IM, than to do the training. It is much easier to have confidence for someone doing IM than it is for me to have confidence in doing IM. For those who look IN on the training, it seems like a lot--and a lot must be good, right? Maybe. Can't tell until the race.
But it IS interesting to ponder why this is so. Eric watches me sacrifice time, sleep, money, sanity, relaxation, pretty much everything....and that gives him a lot of confidence in me. The reality of the situation, though, is that I could barely finish. I CERTAINLY hope this is not the case.....but I'm just a very average person doing a very unaverage event, with a lot of other very exceptional people.
Don't get me wrong--I'm not trying to be negative. I bust my ass day in and day out like everyone else. But the reality of the situation is that I look at the finishing times at the Boulder Long Course last year, and I am going to be in the bottom percent. It's a bit frustrating in some ways. In other ways I'm okay with it--this is my FIRST year of long distance racing. That has to count for something. But being in the bottom percentage reminds me that while I am BUSTING MY ASS day in and day out...I am still at the bottom. :) Killing myself to be in the bottom is better than never being in the race to begin with though.....right? Then part of me is like "who gives a shit what percent you are in? It's your race. If you finish, you win. Period. Run your own damn race."
I was swimming very recently. 8x300 yd intervals. 100-sprint, 100-fast race pace, 100-recovery. Seriously--thought I wasn't going to make the sprints. 25 yds in and my body was already out of oxygen. Quickly went on a fucked up mental trip. I can't do this. This is too hard. Why would anyone want to do this to themselves? I'm not a sprinter. Who cares how fast I take off from the starting line. I'm a long slow distance person. BLAH, BLAH, FUCKING BLAH......I was miserable.
When I started the workout I took 8 pennies and 2 dimes. One dime on the concrete. Under the dime, I made two rows of four pennies vertical. At the bottom I put another dime. Dimes are warmup sets and pennies are intervals. I am lost without a system. So as I am swimming, feeling miserable and negative, I look at ALL of the pennies left at my lane end(in my mind), and feel even worse. I AM NEVER GOING TO FINISH THIS!! WHAT AM I GOING TO DO? SEVEN MORE OF THESE? INTOLERABLE!
After the initial sprint and 75 yards into the "race" pace, I started to feel better. Ok, so just the first half of these intervals suck ass. Can I make it through the first half? I was going to have to come up with a game plan, quickly.
Molly has a wonderful coach, Elizabeth, who wrote an amazing article on women and confidence. I keep it in my planner and read it often. I am absolutely addicited to her article. When my workouts get hard, I think of an analogy she used---a squirrel---fucking fearless--getting it's nuts. She says to get in the pool, talk shit to yourself, and the clock will validate that you totally suck. Get in the pool and think positive, and the clock will validate that you kick ass!
My first strategy on #2 300 yd interval was to fill my head with the word "positive"...repeating it over and over, leaving no room for negativity to creep in and fuck up my swim. It worked pretty well, but took a lot of energy--because I KNEW the negativity was in there--it was just being drowned out. BUT it worked. The sprint was better. #3 and on I tried different approaches. One time I said all positive affirmations to myself: "You are strong, you are tough, you are smart, you are beautiful, you can do this, you've got this, this is good, etc". Another time I thought of the squirrel--and said "squirrel" the entire 100 yds. I even laughed, thinking of the fearless squirrel. Towards the last half of the set, I would repeat the thought of crossing the finish line at IM, hearing my name announced--"Brandy Cohen--YOU ARE AN IRONMAN!" In my mind I related the finish of the race to a excellent swim, and it made the sets fly by. I had to talk myself IN to making the sets be the best that I could give. "Pete wouldn't give me this unless I needed it. This is going to help me be a faster swimmer. I am going to be in better shape because of this. There are other people out there not training as hard as I am. There are people who are more dedicated than I am, and I need to step up. It's better to put in the pain now, to be stronger later. It's not always going to feel like this--just now because I am getting stronger. EVery little bit counts...' and so on, and so on, and so on.
I survived that workout and masochistically ASKED for MORE like it from Pete.
We are all very spoiled. How often do we truly do stuff we don't want to do, besides work? Not very often if you think hard. Ironman training on the other hand forces us to do an array of things we may not want to do--get up early, stay up late, miss parties, miss sleep, miss vacations, do workouts we don't want to do when we don't want to workout, etc. There is no stopping. There is no making up for lost workouts. It's now or never. WE DO WHAT IT TAKES TO GET IT DONE EVEN WHEN WE DONT WANT TO DO IT. We are faced with our spoiled-ness daily, and we turn our backs on giving up.
Iwant to congratulate myself and all of you for STICKING WITH IT--especially when it's hard, especially when you are tired and burned out, and would rather be sitting on your ass, watching cartoons, eating a bowl of ice cream with sprinkles. I still eat the ice cream, but not sit on my ass very much.
This training is time consuming, stressful, hard, but it is so rewarding. Look how far you have come. Really take time to look at what you are accomplishing. Who else in their right mind would have to do a 60 mile ride and get excited? Who else would consider a 60 mile ride a WORKOUT and not complete torture???!!
I am proud to be a part of such an amazing, awe-inspiring, dedicated, rish taking, limit breaking group of motivated, adventure seeking individuals. It is through our shared suffering, sacrifices, and ultimate joy of this sport that we are bonded. We are truly unique and special in our own right.
Again, I am so happy to be here, with you. Taking this journey with others like you makes it so much better.
It's late....12:18am, and I have to get up to go into work early, so I can go to my bike fit appointment on time tomorrow.
Remember--we are incredibly lucky to be able to do what we LOVE--even on the days we fucking HATE it. :) In the end, we are all triathlon addicts and we just have to accept it. :)
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
More Ironman S words, including SEX, and the lack of
Dedicated to Julia, a bunch on naughty S words, intermingled. :)
salad (every day)
shakes (after workouts)
sizes
support
symetry
sizzling
styling
smiling
sunscreen
sunglasses
selling
stickers
sales
spending (endless money)
squishing
sighing
signs
salary (spending all of it on IM)
stuffing (into spandex)
shuffling
sparkling
savings
shorts
specials
spandex
spine
seat
snacks (yummy)
sleep (little of this)
sleepy
snoozing (I wish!)
sneezing (from allergies!)
snakes (I see these all the time)
snot (unfortunately, yes)
sun
strong
silent
splenda
silly
sprint
SOBER
sore
squint
spring
stuck up (colorado cyclists)
snoore
serenity
scrunchies
showers
spastic
slimy
sweatpants
socks
shirts
sounds
sleep in (yeah, right!)
saturday
sunday
someday
summer
squats
stretch
sing
scream
smokin'
sideways
semen
sultry
splendid
speaking
SMILES (for 24 hours)
Ok, your turn.
salad (every day)
shakes (after workouts)
sizes
support
symetry
sizzling
styling
smiling
sunscreen
sunglasses
selling
stickers
sales
spending (endless money)
squishing
sighing
signs
salary (spending all of it on IM)
stuffing (into spandex)
shuffling
sparkling
savings
shorts
specials
spandex
spine
seat
snacks (yummy)
sleep (little of this)
sleepy
snoozing (I wish!)
sneezing (from allergies!)
snakes (I see these all the time)
snot (unfortunately, yes)
sun
strong
silent
splenda
silly
sprint
SOBER
sore
squint
spring
stuck up (colorado cyclists)
snoore
serenity
scrunchies
showers
spastic
slimy
sweatpants
socks
shirts
sounds
sleep in (yeah, right!)
saturday
sunday
someday
summer
squats
stretch
sing
scream
smokin'
sideways
semen
sultry
splendid
speaking
SMILES (for 24 hours)
Ok, your turn.
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